5 Tips To Go From Self-Conscious to Confident

Tip #1 A New Mindset

An important part of becoming more confident is shifting your perspective a little.

Are you worried about people staring at you?

Worried that they would judge you?

Do you think that the people around you are constantly replaying the mistakes that you have made in their heads all day?

If you are like me (and many others!), we are actually all just thinking about ourselves most of the time and worrying about what is going on in our world. So think about it. If everyone around you was busy thinking about those questions I just listed, then they aren’t even thinking about you and in fact thinking the same thing about themselves! Hearing this for the first time has changed how I view things now. It has made me judge myself less for the mistakes I made in public. This also works when approaching new people.

For example, have you ever thought about the person that approached you?

Most likely you will think something like:

“Wow I love their confidence”

However, when you are approaching someone you might be thinking:

“What will they think of me?”

“Will they not want to talk to me?”

This brings me to my next point.

Tip #2 You 100% Miss The Shots You Don’t Take

Yes, yes, this does sound like a cliché quote you would see on Instagram. HOWEVER. It is very true. Let me explain. You want to put yourself out there and make more friends. If you never talk to them and ask, then how will you ever even give the person the chance to say yes. While being rejected can be very scary, what’s the worst possible thing that could happen? They say no? Well, at least you can say you tried!

Are you still thinking: how do I even get the confidence to talk? Where do I even start??

Well, read for more…

Tip #3 Looking Good = Feeling Good.

If you have no idea where to start.

What makes you feel better about yourself?

What gives you the boost that helps you become more confident?

What are some things that you do daily or occasionally that make you feel more uplifted?

Still don’t know where to start?

Here are some ideas:

• Try to experiment with some new looks that you haven’t tried before.

• You can try new outfits that make you feel bold.

• You can change up your hairstyle by cutting or coloring it or even just wearing it in new styles.

While physical appearance can be attended to, how we truly feel on the inside is even more important.

Can’t think how to get started? Just write the first thing that pops into your head. Anne Lamott, author of a book on writing we love, says that you need to give yourself permission to write a “crappy first draft”. Anne makes a great point — just start writing, and worry about editing it later.

Tip #4 Confidence Is An Attitude, Not a Look

While you can experiment with new looks to feel more confident. Looks aren’t everything. Have you seen some “unattractive” people that everyone seems to think are very charismatic, charming and people just really like them? That just goes to show that being confident within your personality plays a bigger role than being physically “attractive” does.

This means feeling comfortable in your own skin. You can do this by:

• Improving your posture and sit up instead of crouching down or folding your arms

• Not being bothered by comments of people who don’t even know you

• Thinking of what you want to say and saying it clearly instead of mumbling or hesitating

• Shifting your focus to the other person instead of over analyzing your actions and words

• Understanding your strengths and what makes you unique

Tip #5

If you still can’t get yourself to feel confident using the tips above. Then you should fake it till you make it!

On a Final Note…

Don’t be too hard on yourself if you don’t change overnight! Learning how to be more confident is a lifelong journey and I will be here to help you make it!